Archive for September, 2012

September 20, 2012

Day 314


This is some kind of new-fangled drink I found at the gas station. I picked it up to avoid having to sample a can of potted meat, the other new food option on their shelves. I hope it never comes to that. Anyhow, this air-freshener-shaped bottle said it would reduce my stress, enhance my mood, improve my concentration and promote a positive outlook. All things the girls at work agreed I needed help with. But when we read further we realized we couldn’t pronounce most of the ingredients. We could plainly read the warning, though: “Not recommended for children under 12 years. If you are pregnant or nursing, contact your physician prior to use.”  That’s really not the type of thing I like to see on my drinks. Unless they’re chock full of booze, of course.

When I checked it out online, I found this funny write-up. And she’s right, webMD says phosphatidylserine can cause insomnia and stomach upset. But they say it’s possibly safe for most people. Possibly. And that’s just one of the ingredients in the “proprietary blend.”

I only braved one sip. Tasted sweet and fakey. Like something that has one of those awful sugar substitutes in it. (It’s got a milky color, too. Weird.) My husband, who came home and took a slug before I could stop him, agrees: His first response: “It’s crap.” His second, to explain it to our 12-year-old: “It’s like a detention in your mouth.”

September 19, 2012

Day 313

Stuffed Hot Pepper (with olive oil)

In a move that can only be described as spiteful, my husband brought a jar of these pickled jobbies home for me to try. As I was gagging on one, he asked (innocently?), “Is it the taste or the texture?” Where do I begin? First off, it’s an oily, slimy mess loaded with some sort of mush in the center. Secondly, the mush, according to the jar, is a cocktail of eggplant, anchovies and breadcrumbs. Whoever cooked this up was a sadist. And, obviously, so is my husband. I only wish I had seen the signs those many long years ago …

September 18, 2012

Day 312

Frito Pie

This Texas specialty is just chili piled onto Frito chips and topped with onions and cheese. Genius.

September 17, 2012

Day 311

Tortilla Soup

Work-buddy Lisa came to my rescue in three different ways with this little cup of love. One, it was a new food. Two, I have a cold and this was toasty and tasty. And three, she picked out all the avocado bits for me, just in case I wasn’t a fan. How sweet is that? Here’s the recipe she used, by Rick Bayless. Highly recommended. With or without the avocado.


September 16, 2012

Day 310

Ginger Beer

I figured this soda couldn’t be much different from ginger ale. But, boy, is it. Super spicy. I kind of liked it, although it did feel like it would quickly burn a hole in my already embattled stomach. I read online that the Brits mix it with regular beer as a type of shandy. So I gave that a whirl. Meh. Could have been better with a darker brew, I guess — I only have namby-pamby light beer around the house.

September 15, 2012

Day 309

Carrot Pudding

I think I’m going to throw my French cookbook in the river. Why take perfectly good ingredients — in this case, fresh-from-the-garden carrots — and slave over them for more than an hour just to come up with a jumble of yuck? Grating, simmering, stirring, beating in an ungodly amount of heavy cream mixed with — you guessed it — too many eggs. In the end it tasted like watery and strangely sweet scrambled eggs. My father-in-law claimed it wasn’t so bad, but I’m pretty sure he was just being kind to the cooking impaired.

September 14, 2012

Day 308

Cabbage Loaf

Never trust a food that isn’t bread but has “loaf” in its name. Not a good sign. Plus, I should have known when I found this egg-heavy recipe in a French cookbook that “cabbage loaf” was code for “cabbage quiche.” I realized my mistake when it came out of the oven looking seriously eggy. (And now my house smells like cabbage and eggs. Perfect.) I really didn’t want to put this in my mouth, even as I watched my husband happily shoveling it in. But it really wasn’t as bad as all that. Kinda bland, even.

September 13, 2012

Day 307

Red Bull

People drink this stuff? Yikes. This mother of the ill-conceived energy drink craze is a sweet, syrupy mess. Double gak.

September 12, 2012

Day 306

Cheese in a Can

People eat this stuff?

September 11, 2012

Day 305

Horseradish Cheddar

There’s no more terrible texture in the world than unmelted cheese. (Although if you ask me again after I put a scoop of dip in my mouth, I might change my answer.) Raw cheese is a burst of chalky that quickly turns into a saliva-laden mush. Yikes. But this cheddar’s tangy horseradish bite was enough to get me past all that.