Wandering around the grocery store this weekend I realized how lucky I was that I only have a few more days left. I’m pretty well out of ideas, except for some places I’m just not willing to go. Like liverwurst. Or pork hocks. Or pickled eggs. Or gefilte fish. I’ll admit I looked long and hard at the pickled eggs and gefilte fish (that has got to be, hands down, the grossest looking food in the world). But I really don’t see the point in torturing myself just to torture myself. What’s it going to accomplish? Am I going to add gefilte fish to my regular diet? Not bloody likely.
Anyway, after depressing myself good and plenty with my startling lack of options, I ran across this little gem. I actually giggled when I saw it sitting there on the store shelf, waiting patiently for me to discover its ludicrousness. And in case you’re wondering, yes, there is actually chicken in these crackers. Specifically, dehydrated cooked chicken. That’s right. It’s crackerfied chicken. I especially love how they misspell components of some packaged delicacies. Just so we don’t accidentally mistake it for real food. I also enjoyed the Easy Cheese advertisement on the back of the box. Because, by golly, if you’re going to eat unrecognizable chicken, you should certainly coat it with unrecognizable cheese.
These weren’t so terrible gross, though. At least not to me, with my high tolerance of extremely processed foods. Just really salty with a (not at all surprising) industrial aftertaste. My daughters both gagged, though. I guess I’m doing something right.